Skincare Savvy: Spousal Edition

I finally had the opportunity to trade in several years worth of Lush pots for a complimentary face mask. Rather than enjoy the spoils of my hard-earned victory by myself, I asked my husband to join me in the process. And rather than blog about my experiences with the face mask, I thought I would blog about his.

Turns out, in what my husband claims is an unsurprising turn of events, he had never done a face mask in his life ever. BB Seaweed would be the first mask that he ever tried (and possibly the last). So uninitiated was he in face masks, he waited downstairs by the television instead of coming up to the bathroom, assuming this process could be done on the couch.

It can’t, by the way, not unless you’re prepared to clean your couch. Lush’s mask formulas are thick, and several of them have large chunks of ingredients, especially BB Seaweed, which contains globs of actual seaweed.

“Is it supposed to look like that?” Husband asked when looking in the pot.

I assured him that it did, but I admit I was asking the same question. It’s been years since I’ve used a Lush mask, but I seem to recall that BB Seaweed used a base of gray clay? This mask looked more pinky-beige. It did smell like I remember, a little briny, salty, earthy. So I globbed a bunch of it on my husband’s face.

For a few seconds, he stood there blinking. “Now what?”

“We leave it on for fifteen minutes,” I replied.

He lifted his glasses into his sight line, lowered them, then lifted them again, squinting. “I can’t see anything!” he said.

That’s when he started moving his face around, scrunching up his eyes. I asked if he was okay, thinking that the mask might be irritating his skin and needed to be washed off. Turned out it was irritating his skin, but just because he’s never had clay on his face. “Wait till it starts to dry,” I told him, to which he yelled, “IT HAS TO DRY?!”

I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the drying is actually my least favourite part. Lush masks, to my memory, left my face feeling smooth, but it was only after sitting there trying not to laugh or smile or move for fear of breaking off clumps of the mask itself.

Husband navigated his way successfully downstairs despite my having rendered him blind without his glasses. Sitting on the couch, we let the mask work its magic, slowly drying over our skin. By the time we got back upstairs, only a fine layer was visible on both of our faces.

“Now what?” Husband asked.

“We wash it off,” I replied.

I thought he would reach for the tap. Instead, he stood there, face over the sink, contorting his face so that pieces of seaweed and dried clay crumbled off his face. I, being the supportive spouse that I am, shoved him out of the way to demonstrate washing one’s face by washing off my own.

The last time I used a Lush face mask, I was probably in university, and I had probably never used a face mask before. I say this because I wasn’t bowled over by the results. My skin felt less oily afterwards, sure, but I can’t say that the mask would have been worth an investment without it being a bonus product from a trade-in.

I went to the husband for his impressions and conducted the following interview:

Me: So what did you think of the mask?”

Husband: ….it was weird.

Me: How does your skin feel?

H: Human.

Me: One thing you liked best?

H: Watching you freak out.

Me: When did I…?

H: When I tried to take the mask off by just wiggling my face!

*cue angry face, followed by the return of my Beauty Blogger Professionalism*

Me: What did you like least?

H: Not being able to see.

Me: Would you ever try a Lush mask again?

H: Not for money. If they gave you too much face mask and you, like, slopped it on me before I had a chance to defend myself, yeah.

Me: Would you ever try another face mask at all?

H: Probably not on purpose.

Me: What do you think would improve the experience?

H: Um…I don’t know, less clay? Maybe not no clay, but certainly less clay?

Me: What does face feel like now?

H: SKIN. It feels bristly because of my [expletive] beard. What does it feel like to you?

*cue face touching*

Me: It feels like skin.

And as much as I would love to say that he was being obstinate or difficult with his answers, that’s very much my verdict as well: the face mask left my skin feeling like, well, skin. Maybe they did change the formula or maybe I chose the wrong one for my skin type, but BB Seaweed doesn’t seem to do much for the face that simply being a face isn’t doing for it already.

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